Labour are the working mans party, funded by the unions, pioneered the welfare state, care about the working man and maintaining his livelihood.
Tories are the old boys club, focus on what I suppose is known as trickle down economics or, if the rich are doing well, we are all doing well.
Lib Dems, well liberal means allowing a man to be the master of his own fate essentially. As long as you don’t hurt anyone else crack on with it. For this reason they are generally more popular with youth (scoff)
Labour – Power hungry individuals formed together to run a country the way they want to; under the guise of being the working mans party but generally ignoring this whilst in power. In my opinion the lesser of the evils but just because she’s wearing pretty make up doesn’t mean she’s not going to fuck you.
Tories – Power hungry individuals formed together to run a country the way that their dad is telling them to; under the guise of understanding the way the country works because of all of their heritage. They really don’t care about helping out the little guy it’s all about pumping money into the pockets of their old school friends. Slick, well polished snake oil salesmen who don’t care about you or your opinion. They are the worst of the three
Lib Dems – Never, been in power, never really expecting to be in power often perceived as a wasted vote and have well and truly shot themselves in the foot by pissing off student voters. Having said that this is the place where you will find well meaning politicians who genuinely believe in what they say. Vince Cable really knows his stuff and is an asset to them. They were forced into a hike in tuition fees in exchange for the AV referendum which the Tories then fucked them on by lying about the way it worked to the general populous.
In truth they are all probably as bad as each other, I vote for whoever I have to in order to keep the Tories out.
Now, UKIP are basically daily mail reading, mouth breathing, closet racists who have such a poor grasp of economics they genuinely believe the UK would be better out of the EU. Don’t vote for them, slap anyone you suspect may vote for them.